My plumbing is driving me mad! For the second time in two weeks, the sewer has backed up into my apartment. This time, it happened before I got a chance to take a shower and get ready for my day. I have subsequently called my appointments for the day and cancelled everything. Apparently the water for the whole apartment complex is off until they get this problem fixed, again.
Times like these have a profound affect on how I feel about this deployment. I know that the issue would still be present if Nathan was here, it just seems like maybe it would matter less. I would have still had to cancel my morning plans and I would probably still be just as irritated. I wouldn't have made the call though. Nathan would have called our property manager and discovered the truth of the issue. He would have spent the last 20 mins plunging the shower drain. Once he realized that there was nothing that he could do to fix the issue, he would have made me laugh about it. I'm sure that he would have suggested some gross thing we could do that didn't require me to smell nice. He probably would have suggested that we stay in bed, or snuggle on the couch and watch bad day time TV until the shower became available again. He would have made it better because that is what Nathan does. He grounds me. He reminds me that when things don't go exactly as planned it is an opportunity for us to have a strange little adventure we didn't expect. Ruined plans are often God's gift to us.
Nathan isn't here to make it better. I can't even call him and vent. It is most definitely times like these that make me miss him the most. Mushy couples and chick flicks don't compare the the backed up sewer. Husbands are rarely the romance saturated beings we dream about but they are always the ones who deal with backed up sewers. When I long for romance, I know that is just the fantasy that lives inside of every girl and I can remind myself of that move on. When the sewer backs up for the second time in two weeks, I need my husband. When the spiders decide that the rain is not for them and the infest our ground floor apartment, I need my husband. When the trash bag is so heavy that I have to hoist it up on my hip to swing it over the edge of the dumpster, I need my husband. When the check engine light comes on, I need my husband.
As women, we like to spout off about how we can handle all of that man stuff and we don't need or want any help. I can guarantee you that I entirely disagree with those views. I don't feel weak because I desire to have my loving husband take care of these things. The truth is, he is better at them than I am. He is wired to understand these things more clearly. I can take out the trash, take the truck to the mechanic, kill the spiders, and deal with the plumber. Nathan just does it better. If I could do everything, then what kind of partnership would we have?
Being self sufficent isn't the wonderous experience that the world will have you believe it is. In fact, it isn't the way to a Godly life. Our Lord desires to teach us how to be fully dependent on Him. He asks us to trust Him for everything and tells us that we can do nothing without His hand in our lives. He also asks us to model our relationship with Him in our marriages. I am designed to be dependent, to some degree, on my husband. We are joined together as one. Without him, I am not my best, whole woman and without me, he is wandering in the Garden. God created me to be a helper for Nathan. He gave me skills and talents and a personality that complements Nathan. He designed me to depend on Nathan for many things, to be led by Nathan and to trust Nathan's judgement. For this season in our lives, God has given us this challenge and He asks me to lean on Him in order to meet the demands of this deployment. He has done the same for Nathan. We must both seek God in order to grow in this marriage. Every season of our lives teaches us more about the character of God. Every season teaches us how to grow closer to our Lord. This season, my sewer season, is teaching me an appreciation for the differences in Nathan and I. I am learning how much I do need Nathan in my life and in our home. I look at him differently than I might otherwise. I become more and more greatful for him with each day that passes and with each time that our sewage becomes a part of my day. I look forward to all of the plumbing issues that Nathan will handle when he is finally here. I look forward to appreciating every bag of trash he takes to the dumpster and every oil change and tire rotation he handles. I look forward to a plethera of dead spiders who drew their last breath at the hands of my husband. I also look forward to changed plans and a lazy day in bed with Nathan because we have no water. For now, I thank God for the lessons I am learning and for a new found appreciation of my loving, spider killing husband.
